i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
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