i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
