I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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