...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Randomize
