and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
