did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
