Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Randomize
