It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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