Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
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