I want to stick my p in your. b.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
