and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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