We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Randomize
