Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize
