a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
