She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i think my mom watched the whole time
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
I'm always down for nudity.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
