Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it

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(217): View more from Illinois

Why is there a cactus in the microwave?

(1-217): View more from Illinois

Don't worry about it.

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(309): View more from Illinois

i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.

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(516): View more from New York

The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us

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(732): View more from New Jersey

You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa

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(702): View more from Nevada

At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.

(1-702): View more from Nevada

If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

the night was just a blur of sex and pie

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(479): View more from Arkansas

Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml

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