try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
