i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
