I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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