The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
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