it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
