My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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