wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Randomize
