My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Randomize
