I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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