Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize