Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
