she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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