i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Randomize
