I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
