Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
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