i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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