You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
two words...techno handjob
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Green mimosas i think yes
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
