I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
time to smoke my breakfast
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
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