Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
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