Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
