he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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