Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
