I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
