just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
