It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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