Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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