I must be too annoying 4 u.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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