first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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