So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
