i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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