I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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