Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
