Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
