where am i from again
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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