OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
